Seeing People Come and Go is a Part of Life

Hey my loves,

The author Nicholas Sparks once wrote, “People come, people go- they’ll drift in and out of your life, almost like characters in a favorite book. When you finally close the cover, the characters have told their story and you start up again with another book, complete with new characters and adventures. Then you find yourself focusing on the new ones, not the ones from the past.”

Which brings me to the question: how do you know who will stay in your life permanently? how do you know who is seasonal or who was born to stay?

The answer is you don’t.

Life is so complex, yet we are so “ordinary”. There are 7 billion people living in the world. If you meet someone who changes your life, it was not an accident. In movies, we see the guy bump into the girl and they both live happily ever after…yada yada yada. You can bump into someone in real life and give them a genuine smile apologizing for the mishap. That was probably a simple gesture you had to make because the person you bumped into was having a bad day and needed a smile for encouragement. That doesn’t necessarily mean you will marry that person or cause a huge impact in their life. It just means you had to cross paths for a specific reason. The universe doesn’t make mistakes. The universe also doesn’t come with instructions or a forewarning why you meet certain people you connect with. Every person that comes into our life has a mission and a reason why they’ve connected to us. The part we all wish we could change is “weeding” out the ones who are going to stay in our life permanently vs. the seasonal people. The most exhilarating feeling is knowing some of the best moments in your life hasn’t even happened yet. And then you have to wonder: who will it happen with? Will I still be best friends with this person ten years from now? Have I already met my future husband? There are so many questions we ask ourselves and the only way to get the answers is to live life and wait patiently for them…and its also essential to know when something or someone has reaches their “deadline” in your life. Every person that passes through your life can’t stay in it. Don’t mix up seasonal lessons with lifetime people.

It’s risky every time you meet someone new and you decide to make a connection with them. You can talk for hours. You can talk for days. In a blink of an eye, you notice you don’t even hear from them anymore. You can’t even remember the sound of their voice. It’s disappointing that everybody you meet will not always be the person they appear to be. What you do know is every person you meet is not a coincidence. Maybe that person is meant to love you. Maybe that person is meant to help you. Maybe that person is just supposed to be a simple hello on your bad days. Whatever the reason may be, it’s scaring to know you can put your all in a person and they might not come through. You can have the most intense conversations with them and they take that away. What you do have are the memories. You have the lessons that others taught you when they left your life and didn’t explain why. There are scary parts in meeting people. The good parts are the people who stand beside you no matter how hard it gets. The conversations never get dull. Their love never dies. These are the people who help diminish your fear when you encounter new people. The universe never stops just because people hurt or leave us. We have to keep pushing.

“No matter what is going on in your life today, remember, it is only preparation. People come and go; situations rise and fall; it’s all preparation for better things. You must stretch, reach, grow into your goodness. Without the preparation we receive through adversity, disappointment, confusion, or pain, we could not appreciate the goodness when it arrives.”

-Iyanla Vanzant

Placing your happiness in someone’s hands should never be the option for your life. We tend to look for our happiness in people and this gives them control of our self-esteem. Why is it called self-esteem? Because it is for self, meaning only us should have control over us.