It was a beautiful Thursday afternoon. I was in the car riding with my best friend and her husband. As I sat there thinking, the song “The Dreamer” by Anderson. Paak blasted through the speakers in the car. The beat caught my attention and I liked the song automatically when I heard the chorus:
"This one's for all the little dreamers And the ones who never gave a fuck I'm a product of the tube and the free lunch Living room, watching old reruns And who cares your daddy couldn't be here? Mama always kept the cable on I'm a product of the tube and the free lunch Living too, watching reruns." Don't stop now, keep dreaming.
I’m a product of free lunch and being raised by a single mother who took care of me and my little brother. My mom’s determination and her “get it done by any means necessary” attitude affected me in positive way as I became an adult, and I started asking myself what do I want people to remember about me as a writer? As a person? As a friend? What mark will I leave on people’s hearts when I’m no longer here?
As I discover more about myself, I realize I can’t share my dreams with everyone because everyone doesn’t operate like me. Everyone doesn’t have the same mindset as me. When you tell your dreams to a person who isn’t even aligned with their own dreams, it sounds like you’re bragging when you share your goals and/or accomplishments. The truth is people fall in different categories. We have the following:
- DOERS- You are past the “dreaming” stage. You work efficiently to complete the goal every time. You deliver by doing it, even when you don’t feel like it.
- DREAMERS: – The idea is in you. Manifesting ideas and using techniques to get your goals running. You are creative, but you have to become a “doer” also.
- THINKERS: –The ones who keep the business running. The masterminds behind the scenes. Always have people who are smarter than you on your team!
- SLACKERS: the uninspired. Not willing to work. Comfortable with sleeping on their own goals. You think you have plenty of time to complete your goals.
“The heaviest thing is life is carrying a sack of decaying goals.”
I have gotten to the point where I get mad at myself for “sleeping on myself”. Sure, I expect people who don’t know me or my mission to sleep on me, but its a major problem when the person who is responsible for the dream isn’t even taking the steps to live the dream. As I prepared to write this blog, I received many affirmations. Sometimes, its crucial to get gentle reminders from God and the universe that you are exactly where you are supposed to be.
The other day, I watched an interview from Duchess of Ink on Sister Circle, and she said, ” We are always too busy being our own worst critic that we forgot to be our cheerleader. We have other people cheering us on, but we forget to cheer for ourself.” A light bulb went off in my head like, “That is so true!”
I tend to be my own worst critic, so that’s why I started a “self-discipline” challenge this week. They say it takes 22 days to form a habit. The habit I want to create is becoming a better writer. The steps I’m doing is becoming more consistent with my writing and blogs, engaging with my readers and followers, more interaction with my mentor, and less interaction with “distractions”(which means I have to practice time management), prioritize my to-do list everyday, spend less time with social activities (which is a small sacrifice), and staying away from “slackers”. This is easier said than done. The motivation that keeps me going is no one can complete my dreams except me. If I don’t complete my goals, there is no one to blame but me. If I don’t feel successful, there is no one to blame but me.
Everybody isn’t born with a silver spoon, but don’t let determine what your destiny is going to be. I don’t care what race or background you come from. You do not have to be a product of your environment. The obstacles and struggles you may face will make you appreciate the small things when you become successful.
I received another confirmation the other day on my lunch break. Sometimes, I get weary and overwhelmed working a full time job and keeping my brand running. On my lunch break, I went to the library and checked out the book, “Writer With A Day Job” By Aine Greaney. The book teaches you exercises about maintaining a full time job and being a full time writer. As I checked out, the title of the book caught the librarian’s eye and she asked me if I was a writer. She then told me that a good friend of hers balances a day job/brand and she is now a N.Y. Times Bestselling Author. She looked at me and said, “You can do it.”
She helped me change my perspective.
The path to your dreams might not look the way you want, but you have to lean on God’s understanding and know his plan is always the best.
I have heard every excuse in the book from people about why they can’t complete their dreams. They are not inspired. They work too much. They don’t have time. The list goes on and on! Truth of the matter is, every successful could have said all of the above and did nothing as well- but they didn’t. That’s what makes the “doers” different from everyone else. If you’re feeling uninspired or don’t know which direction to take, here are 3 simple steps to get started.
1.) Set small goals first.
When we launch new ideas, it is so easy to rush the process and bite off more than we can chew. Start off with a small to-do list scratching off the small goals that will lead you to your big goals. Get rid of any distractions! (For the self-discipline challenge, I’m starting the habit of putting my phone away when I blog. If my phone is not in my reach, I can focus better on my work and not be tempted to pick it up.)
2.) Sit with the winners.
Sit with the winners. The conversation is always different. The goal is to learn what you don’t know from people who have already accomplished where you are trying to be. If you work in a corporate workplace, soak up knowledge from your boss and the people who run the business. If you’re an entrepreneur, find people of the same caliber you can vent and relate to. It’s also important to find people who are smarter than you in areas you need improvement in.
3.) A dream doesn’t become reality until you’re realistic about it.
You ever heard the saying “it takes 10 years for overnight success?” Take heed because it is true! You won’t be successful by giving the bare minimum. You won’t get where you want to be by being inconsistent. You won’t become the person you need to be if you’re content with being stagnant. Nothing worthy comes from staying in your comfort zone. Despite everything that you think is stopping you from chasing your dreams, the only limit is you. God is waiting on you! Trust me, it seems gloomy now, but the reward is always better than the sacrifice.
I believe in you…but that’s doesn’t matter if you don’t believe in yourself first.
Until next time,